My Followers…..


I am sad to say that you won’t be seeing me for a while. Thanks to the problems that I am having finding work I will be temporarily offline. Until I can come up with the money, my internet/cable will be disconnected as of 04-13-13. Right now, we owe $201.71, so it may be a while before I can come back and harp some more about the stupidity in the world.

Until the day of my return, I hope that you will continue to share my blog with your friends, family, neighbors, classmates, co-workers, bosses, politicians or the next stranger you meet.

I will miss you greatly and hope that I don’t lose any of you during this time of desperation.

Thank you for joining me in protesting stupidity.

Please feel free to continue using the OHS (Hypocrites Anonymous) page for group therapy sessions.

Big Hugs to all.

PS: I am setting my blog up to accept all comments without a moderator, so please keep the fighting to a minimum. Thank you.

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Discipline/Punishment


Is there a difference?

When you say “discipline”, what is the first thing that comes to mind? Is it a swat on the butt? A smack on the hand? Or maybe you think of grounding, removal of a favorite toy, sitting in the corner, etc.

These are in actuality forms of punishment.

When you say “punishment”, what is the first thing that comes to mind? Getting smacked in the face (hard enough to leave bruises)? Getting hit with a foreign object like a belt, wooden spoon, or other item that leaves excruciating bruises, welts, cuts and scars? Being locked up in a small room with no light, very little airflow, or room to stand or stretch out?

These are in actuality forms of abuse.

If you look the two terms up in most dictionaries or other reference material, you most likely will find that the terms are considered synonymous with each other. One is the outcome of the other.

We have thought of discipline and punishment in conjunction with each other for so long that it is difficult for us to separate them. Unfortunately, this is exactly what we need to do.

I feel that the dry definitions of these two words do not show the whole picture.

So, in my infinite wisdom, I am taking a leap of faith and writing down how I feel that we should go about separating. Believe me when I say, that this is very nerve-wracking for me. Living through abuse as a child makes this a difficult subject for me to be non-aggressive in the stamping on someone else’s views. But I will do my best to keep this general, informative and thought-provoking.

Here we go:

Discipline is what humans, both individually (as parents) and socially (as a society), use to instill order in our environment. This can be done through self-discipline, familial discipline, societal discipline, political discipline, cultural discipline, or religious discipline. When you get right down to it, discipline is a means of teaching one’s self and/or those around us what is good and acceptable for us.

Discipline is also the teaching of others what is acceptable behavior within societal environs. Basically, this is done by explaining to those around us what society likes or does not like of different types of behavior. These explanations can get very repetitive with young children, persons with certain types of disabilities and those that are just plain stubborn in accepting what you are teaching. This constant repetition can get very frustrating, but a strong enough form of self-discipline can prevent the breakdown into excessive punishment (known as abuse). As an example, just think about this simple question that everyone who has been around young children knows quite well. “Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?” Irritatin’ ain’t it?

Discipline can usually be accomplished by the simple expedient of saying “Please don’t do that” or “I like what you just did” or “I appreciate how you acted just now” or “That is not very nice”. That is it. That is all it takes (granted it takes multiple repetitions to get the point across) to let the people around you know what is acceptable to you. In a societal setting though, we have to get a bit more specific. Hence the laws that have been codified refined and expanded on throughout the centuries. They are basically a large group of people saying “We will not accept (this type of behavior)” or “(This type of behavior) is not good for society”.

People that use the above form of discipline have usually been denigrated for being weak or wishy-washy, when in actuality they are following the true definition of the term. Those who denigrate their methods are thinking about punishment.

Punishment is the consequence of the failure to do what is good and acceptable to those around you. If you choose to “break the rules” of the individual, family, society, culture or religion that you are in, then you will be forcefully reminded, either verbally or physically, that you messed up. This can take many forms from shunning to death.

Punishment is definitely something that should fit the “crime”. The degree of punishment naturally depends on the severity of the “crime” and the number of people who were affected. Obviously refusing to eat your peas when you are a toddler is not going to require as much punishment as going on a mass murder spree when you are an adult.

A simple “No” works very well with very young toddlers and infants old enough to know what it means. Unfortunately, humans have this nasty propensity to push the boundaries on a regular basis. Therefore, once we know that the other person understands the concept of “no”, and continues to behave unacceptably, the form of punishment we use must be increased (in very small increments) until a balance has been achieved. There is no need to knock a child down because they tried to grab something out of your hand. A light slap on the hand is enough.

Conversely, someone who knows the difference between right and wrong that deliberately sets out to cause harm to those around them should not be let off with a slap on the hand. If you are old enough to understand “I don’t like this being done to me, so other people probably won’t like it either” and then intentionally harm someone else, then you should be punished in such a manner that you won’t want to harm another ever again.

Some ideas of punishment that come to me include making the crime and punishment public (no matter what the criminal’s age, sex, religion, politics, race, etc.). Embarrassment is a wonderful form. Punishment is meant to be unpleasant. Also, get rid of the TV’s, computers, exercise equipment and fictional books that are routinely found in our jails and prisons. If you are worried about the inmates becoming unruly or even going so far as to riot, keep them in separate rooms when they are not working their butts off. You can keep them busy by re-instituting chain-gangs and physical labor nationwide. If the criminal want something to read (should they are still awake enough), let them read from dictionaries, encyclopedias, textbooks and other types of instructional material. Another reason to keep them busy or separated is to contain the forced sex that occurs in this type of situation.

Jail is not meant to be abusive or dangerous to health. Having medical services in the prison itself is a definite keeper. We definitely want to keep the indoor plumbing, actual mattresses, proper food, clothing and shoes, as well. I also feel that having access to telephones and visitation is beneficial, as well. They are reminders to the criminal of what he/she is missing out on by committing a crime. I do not believe that conjugal visitations have any benefit above the previous sentence what so ever. It is nothing more than saying that it is ok for some to get what others can’t have. It is a source of disruption. If you want to get laid, then you shouldn’t have committed the crime.

If the crime is horrendous enough, I am a firm believer in the death penalty. I also feel that criminals that flat-out refuse to accept society’s laws and repeatedly commit vicious crimes should be added to the horrendous crime category. Most likely their multiple crimes equal one horrendous crime. On top of that, if the death penalty is handed down, it should be implemented within a fairly short period of time. If you are going to use it, then friggen use it! I realize that the criminal has the right to appeals, but there are only so many times that you can rehash the evidence without coming up with something new to use as a mitigating circumstance. If it was in the evidence, then it would have been set out in the first place. If you were found guilty of the horrendous crime because you committed it, then why should we allow you to sit on death row, sucking up tax dollars and wasting people’s time having to take care of you? I know that there are people out there that will be extremely offended by this, but a bullet or a rope does not cost near as much as using the electric chair or euthanasia drugs. You might want to keep that in mind.

Crimes affecting a large number of people, like drug dealing or bank robbery, should also be in this category. Drug dealing, especially in the upper levels, reaches hundreds or thousands of people either directly (users) or indirectly (family, friends, coworkers or victims of the users crimes). Bank robbing also affects hundreds or thousands of people by causing financial insurance rates to go up nationwide, which is then passed on to the customers in general. Both of these crimes generally have a death that can be attributed to them, as well. They also cause taxes to be used to catch the criminal, bring them to trial and keep them in jail. This results in taxes being raised nationwide. (Oops! I just realized that the last sentence is true for all other crimes, so I may need to figure out how to keep a petty criminal from being sentenced to death along with the extreme criminals. It is very difficult to keep the levels separate, isn’t it?)

By instituting and enforcing these types of measures we can build a more stable society, reduce the number of crimes committed and a cause a major reduction of the number of prisons needed. Not to mention a reduction in the taxes required to run them all. The down side to this type of reduction is the loss of jobs available. That would be something to look into prior to implementing any sweeping legal changes.

Conversely, the taxes saved from not building and staffing prisons could go to building and staffing schools. The way things are going in this day and age, I am sure that many schools would be more than happy to accept security staff that was trained to handle criminals in most situations. What little training needed for the other situations wouldn’t take very long or cost near as much. Hmmmm….that would take care of the job issue, and would make it easier for the teachers and other staff members. Just think of how many workers that we would be able to move from prisons to schools. It would definitely increase the safety of our children.

My Apologies


To those of you that have allowed me into your lives, I ask your forgiveness and extend my apologies for not blogging over this past week.

It has not been a good week for me and mine. I have been dealing with an infected tooth, which, I am sure, some of you know what that feels like. We have also lost a very close friend of ours to liver failure at the age of 52 due to complications from cancer. On top of that, we lost a family member, who was in his late 60’s or early 70’s, due to complications from cancer. Both of whom developed these complications after the fact. This wouldn’t have been quite so hard on us, except that they both passed away within 12 hours of each other on Wednesday, October 10, 2012 (R.I.P.). We then found out the next day that my boyfriend’s nephew lost a very lucrative job with an oil company due to cutbacks. I am still looking for work, and just received the bill from the emergency room in the amount of $680. Add to that our upcoming bills for gas, electricity, plates for the jeep, car insurance and next month’s rent. I have also had to cancel my dental appointment due to a lack of funds. Which will most likely cause another trip to the emergency room for more antibiotics when the tooth infection flares up again.

On the plus side, we are all medically healthy, still have a home to live in, and I am going to start looking for work outside of my home, since I can’t find a decent paying job online that matches my skill level. Because of this, I will most likely be very sporadic with my blogs and hope that all of you will stick with me throughout this trying period of my life. It may take a while to get a routine down so that I can begin blogging on a regular basis again, but I will do my best to post at least once a week, hopefully more. Just don’t hold your breath on the “more” part.

I will understand if some of you no longer follow me during the next few months, but I do hope that you will continue to check back on occasion to see when I have posted something new. I also intend to post as many as I can, as often as I can, during the next few weeks. I have some ideas to blog about, but would appreciate all the ideas that you can come up with and are willing to pass on to me. The more controversial, the better. Just don’t get too angry if I take your ideas in a completely different direction than you expected.

Thank you for being you and accepting me.

Hugs.

Are you ready for some football???


Every year we celebrate the children returning to school. No more High C Soprano screams in the neighborhood.  No more loud cars and stereos vibrating their way past your house all day long. You can justify keeping that irritating bumper rider at a sedate 20 mph for the next 4 or 5 blocks.

Then you come home, turn on the TV, and BLAM!, the first game of the season smacks you in the face.

Don’t get me wrong. I am all for sports.  They help keep people active, healthy and outdoors.  They allow college scholarships for high school athletes, create an incredible amount of job opportunities from grade school scrambles on up to professional teams, and give the financially disadvantaged child the knowledge that they can make their dreams happen. They also keep the older crowds’ metabolism up with all of the jumping, yelling, finger-pointing, bleacher coaching and couch crunching going on each year.

So, there you are, staring in dread at the screen. Your brain shuts down for just the tiniest moment before going in to football overdrive.  How many games will I have to host?  Who all will be coming? Will it be for the kids or the adults?  How many snack foods will be needed?  Has the carpet shampooer been serviced? Who was that party planner I met the other day (now I know why she was smirking)? Where did I put her card? Will the dog get over-excited  and make a mess on the neighbors lap? Will I survive till March?

As these questions, and many others, run through your mind, you take a deep breath and let it out. You take another deep, deep breath and slowly let it out. You stand up and find yourself vowing to the Lord (and any other deities that might exist) that you will not allow yourself to be stranded in the kitchen this year because you don’t know anything about football. You are going to learn everything there is to know about things like “offense”, “defense”, “special teams” and the different positions in each one. You will learn what the actual rules are, because you will be a member of the group. No more asking “what does that mean?” or “why do they do that?” and “when will the game be over?”

Then we realize that we left it too long. Our day-to-day routines have left little time to sit down and decipher the foreign language of “rules & regulations”, “playbooks” and intra-team lingo. We slowly lower our fist, let our shoulders droop and shuffle into the kitchen to begin making dinner.  As we sit down to an indifferently cooked meal, we listen to the excited chatter from around the table. Football…..football…..football……………

Isn’t it just ducky?

Hi. My name is Echo & I am a football widow. 

The man I love has suddenly become the world’s greatest coach. Everything his chosen team, the opposing team and the referees do is wrong. The refs will make all the wrong calls at all the worst possible moments. Defense will not sack the quarterback, tackle the running back or wide receiver, pick up the fumble or block the field goal. Yet again, the offense will fail to block the defense, drop the ball, throw for negative yards or step out-of-bounds at the wrong time.  My personal favorite is when they throw the short pass to the side and get tackled behind the line of scrimmage.  Oh, how he starts to bounce in his chair, as though he was Skip from ESPN’s First Take, which is pretty impressive since he is in a wheelchair.  Every year I wonder if we will have to replace it after each game. Luckily, they make them very sturdy these days.

As football widows, we get to sit and listen (during the game) to how that play should have been done, why that ref is blind, where that particular WR should be sent (because he is so slow, clumsy, fast, etc.) and whether or not the QB should be benched for such poor decisions. After the game, we get to listen to a play by play breakdown between him and his friends. Each play is dissected down to its individual foot movement, arm movement and body position. Friends that were unable to be here are called and the whole game rehashed over the phone. The debates go on and on. Usually, they last longer than the game did. You hear it at the office, in the parking lot and in the grocery stores. Finally, we only hear only the occasional comment. That is, until the next game (usually the next day, or on the next channel, depending on your cable package).

Whatever happened to football on Sundays and holidays? When did it become a daily ritual to go through the TV guide searching for each & every game time?  How did my home become the coaches’ box multiple times a day? How did we get transported continuously to exotic places like Denver, Indianapolis and other states? Who realized that college football would be as addictive as the NFL?

For almost every day of the week, for the rest of the year, we will be watching & listening. Trying to learn & understand what it is we are hearing. As we listen, we think that we are actually learning something about that game called “Football”. That all-encompassing, illusive sport that sucks our men’s attention away from “normal” life. We think to ourselves “I am really going to be able to join the group this year.”

It never occurs to us that we think the exact same thought every year. And every year, we go through the same process. From preseason to post season, we hold tight to that vow we made. The refrain “Never Again” echoes through the minds of football widows across the world. Never admitting to ourselves that when post season is over we will go back to the mundane routine that interfered with learning about football in the first place.

Football widows are so naïve…………….

……..My dog is in here cowering. I think she is of the opinion that “daddy” is mad at her.  If she could just figure out how to get into that little box, onto the field and chase those “idiots” in the right direction then “daddy” would stop yelling.  She is such a sweet, loyal, misguided, naïve little puppy.  You would think that she would have learned, after 8 ½ years, that this happens every year.

She is a football widow also.